By - Joyful_Sadness_
I nominate str8aura just because
to assassinate or be assassinated
Grey man looking ass out here trying to pull off assassinations all innocuous
To donate the money
If you assassinate yourself, you can do both.
That is the question
u/str8aura I also nominate you
one day I'll find the single worst string of words to ever colonize the human mind, but until then, I guess I'll keep doing this for free
not stopping till you reach supercritical bastard huh
*Image Transcription: Tumblr*
I'm response to the announcement of Post+, I've decided to announce my own premium service on Tumblr. I'm calling it Post- and here's how it works:
For a one time fee of $1 I will permanently delete one of my posts. For $2.50 you can preemptively stop me from making a post. For $10 you can buy my silence for a month. And for $25 I will personally assassinate another Tumblr user.
For $26 you get to choose how they die.
It's come to my attention that my rates are pretty low and there is a concern that I will end up being hired to kill the entirety of Tumblr's userbase. I've heard your concerns and in response I've decided to change my price for taking out a hit.
It now costs 25¢ to hire me to assassinate a Tumblr user of your choosing.
Where's your ko-fi
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I choose for them to die by being dragged behind a car sent to deliver a briefcase full of money to a hiding place only I know the location of. Cha-ching!
Congrats on your suitcase of Venezuelan bolívar.
Eh, it’s cheaper than paying for toilet paper.
Yeah, but it's one ply.
Just put a few bills back-to-back. It’s still cheaper. The whole briefcase probably wouldn’t get me a single square.
the "you can buy my silence for \_\_\_\_$/month" ~~meme~~ prophecy has finally come true!
Wasn’t that like
Didn’t she really say if someone paid her $8,000/month she would stop posting
I feel like it's super illegal to even offer to kill someone, even if it's obviously a joke. Like 1st amendment and all, but like OP should sleep with a loaded M1911A1 under their pillow for the black SUVs
I feel like they’re still keeping the price to choose the death method at $26
True! I didn't notice that; good observation.
brb, ordering a hit on myself
Hold on let me go delete my tumblr account, gotta stay safe y’know
Gotta go sign into mine to make sure it's still active.