T O P

Sirius takes off with Harry in 1981 and desperately goes to his grandfather for help. The latter gives him an ultimatum, marry the recently widowed Mrs. Zabini in order to get help to keep Harry. The two of them spend the next years trying to secretly kill each other.

Sirius takes off with Harry in 1981 and desperately goes to his grandfather for help. The latter gives him an ultimatum, marry the recently widowed Mrs. Zabini in order to get help to keep Harry. The two of them spend the next years trying to secretly kill each other.

myshittywriting

> Harry and Blaise grew up to be the best brothers ever clueless about what was happening behind closed doors Or they know vaguely what's happening but now have a really skewed idea of what love is. And now, for the next seven years, Harry is worried that all of his defense professors are coming onto him.


A_Fellow_Weeb

That's probably the more likely situation, and when he mentions it to Sirius and family, suddenly the two murderous adults have a target to focus on (Lockhart, for one) as they both care for Harry to some degree. At least, that's what I'd like to see in something like that.


pygmypuffonacid

Now I'm just picturing Harry writing a letter home ... address to Mum and Dad Sometime in his 2nd year at hogwarts and listing out the disconcerting facts of his current school year. Sirius Cutting open the letter with the sharper end of a jagged knife that still had a bit of his blood on it from where his darling wife had tossed it at his head after a particularly pointed comment about her nail Polish it had only graced his cheek but he had taken the necessary precautions of sanitizing and checking for poison with his wand before handling it. His darling bride was a clever and vengeful woman he hadn't been stabbed more than once only to be poisoned by what with the blade was laced with. The woman In question his spouse of almost a decade was calmly on her 2nd glass of wine of the morning drunk before 10:00 a.m. was the normal when the children had just left for school she pulled herself out of the temporary alcoholic spiral sometime around Halloween and then be back to her normal vengeful highly accurate knife throwing self. Sirius As was tradition at this point took advantage of the brief window of alcoholism to thoroughly attempt every possible combination to Decapitate poison strangle or otherwise execute his beloved wife but she had a rather strange habit of losing the ability to balance on heels when intoxicated the children had never seen it and they never would as their mother was a responsible parent but loathed to be anywhere near him without a bit of libation at least for the 1st month or so and serious had to agree with her he indulged in more than one shot a fire whiskey the 1st week the boys left for campus. Marguerite was sober enough so he read the letter aloud just as she was eating a bit of her bacon he had the torch his eggs as they were laced with something glowing and mildly radioactive his wife had the most interesting friends what the fall of the Soviet Union her brother Augustus a squib Made the most interesting connections , He had even offered serious a fighter Jet a few months back with the offer it could be for the boys for cwibbage training purposes. Sirius Had almost taken him up on that before remembering jet engines and brooms Didn't tend to mix well wizards tended Tended to end up like waterfowl when encountering them. A moment later the envelope was sliced the knife embedded in the table for later inspection and the letter read aloud by the 2nd sentence serious was already picturing the proper methods for performing a bloody Eagle like The Vikings of old and marguerite it had paused mid sip politely poured her wine class into the topiary that was hiding a small poisonous Asp serious had placed there before breakfast the snake hissed at its alcoholic bath but otherwise remained relatively docile and the lady black started mentally tallying who owed her favors As to dispose of the body quickly and in conspicuous they had those nasty little trackers at the department of magical law enforcement these days so you had to be slightly more careful when disposing of a high profile figure. Lockhart would be dead by the weekend if what the letter indicated was the whole story and it would seem her husband was an agreementWhen she looked at him a moment later perfectly calm raising a well manicured eyebrow smiling the ruby red of her lips flickering in the candlelight before she said as sweetly as Apple pie and just as deadly the cheddar cheese was always laced with something noxious when the children left for hogwarts," Shall we re direct our energies darling perhaps a truce until we deal with the threat to our boy." Sirius nodded In Grim solidarity Before raising his Glass of pumpkin juice and saluting his wife. Saying the word truce Before taking a swallow of it . Or at least Attempting to marguerite Blasted the goblet out of His hand for he could bring The medal to his lips. In the same sweet Seductive and deadly voice his wife explained, " Boom slang venom my love It's quite effective." Sirius smiled With the same leave the edge and offered up a polite, " Creative My luminous starlight." Both of their eyes promising death after the threat was neutralized. Sorry I couldn't resist it's a good idea


Slytherin2urheart

Omg, this great! It’s totally giving me Adams Family vibes too. 🙈😬


Shah927

This is awesome!


EndlessTheorys_19

Lockhart is actually the only one who doesnt try to kill harry at some point, every other one ends the year trying to murder him, or eat in Lupin’s case,


dogsfuckedthepope_

Uh, he tried to wipe Harry's memory in the Chamber and was going to claim he and Ron lost their minds. I'd count death of self as a murder attempt.


Tsorovar

Umbridge did a lot but never got as far as murder, as far as I recall


EndlessTheorys_19

Oh yeah i forgot about her. Oops


Pitiful_School9925

It ends up like "Love is War" eventually, where Harry tries increasingly crazy schemes to get Daphne to confess her love.


Stralend

This is just a whole different take on events. Fan fiction never fails to amaze me


Brainstorm28

One thing I never thought, is WHY Ms. Zabini killed her husbands. Was it for money? Were they evil? Like why.


Riddle-in-a-Box

Some different, but repeated, takes I've heard are: \- It's all for money \- She needed to move up in status \- some of them were involved in the murder of her first husband and she was getting revenge


stolethemorning

One thing I never understood was why people would still marry her! Even if she’s really hot and manipulative, nothing can make someone forget about 6 deaths with presumably suspicious circumstances. I once read a fic where this was explained by her making a deal with people who were already dying and didn’t have long to live. She’d make their last days comfortable and not lonely, they’d go on fun trips together, and then when they died she’d get the money.


Maximum_Arachnid2804

ooh what’s that fic called? it sounds interesting


stolethemorning

Ahh I really don’t remember :( It wasn’t a main part of the fic, i think it was a Slytherin Hermione or Slytherin Harry story where they became friends with Zabini and the wife rumour was discussed. Or possible a Theo Nott/Blaise Zabini story, hmmm.


Embarrassed_Noise_34

Was it a Colubrina one? I remember something similar


PuzzleheadedPool1

>One thing I never understood was why people would still marry her! Rich, beautiful and not rejecting old codgers outright. There are some who would have been willing to die for just one night with her. 6 months is positively generous.


pearloftheocean

I'm assuming she came from an italian pureblood family but her family wasn't rich like the Malfoy's. So she married several rich men (not as rich as the Malfoy's but still rich) and they all died leaving her their fortunes.


CorsoTheWolf

So she could make room for the next one. and it would be money. I think in situations like that most of the deeds and heirlooms would go to the husbands family and she would get a large cut of the gold. The possible exception would be whoever sired Blaise, and whether Zabini is her maiden name or if she married into it.


tfolau

Read a fic where her first husband abused her and pushed her to the edge resulting in her killing him. Then she gets addicted to that and ends up scoping out evil, rich men to marry and then kill. So, she's basically a serial killer of evil, horny old men lol it's not even the main plot line, just a background plot that Blaise is aware of. I think it might be linkffn(I'm not a sociopath)


FanfictionBot

[***I'm not a Sociopath***](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13534332/1/) by [*KyKyuKai*](https://www.fanfiction.net/u/8877203/KyKyuKai) > So I get sent to another universe and decide that the best way to survive is to become a strong force by using any means necessary: blackmail, violence, manipulation, creating a criminal organization, etc\. But does that really make me a sociopath? I'd like to think not but no one seems to believe me and personally it's a bit rude, but the again maybe they might have a point\. SI fic ^*Site*: ^fanfiction.net ^**|** ^*Category*: ^Harry ^Potter ^**|** ^*Rated*: ^Fiction ^M ^**|** ^*Chapters*: ^55 ^**|** ^*Words*: ^246,122 ^**|** ^*Reviews*: ^225 ^**|** ^*Favs*: ^839 ^**|** ^*Follows*: ^781 ^**|** ^*Updated*: ^May ^16, ^2020 ^**|** ^*Published*: ^Mar ^28, ^2020 ^**|** ^*Status*: ^Complete ^**|** ^*id*: ^13534332 ^**|** ^*Language*: ^English ^**|** ^*Genre*: ^Adventure/Crime ^**|** ^*Characters*: ^OC ^**|** ^*Download*: ^[EPUB](http://www.ff2ebook.com/old/ffn-bot/index.php?id=13534332&source=ff&filetype=epub) ^or ^[MOBI](http://www.ff2ebook.com/old/ffn-bot/index.php?id=13534332&source=ff&filetype=mobi) --- **FanfictionBot**^(2.0.0-beta) | [Usage](https://github.com/FanfictionBot/reddit-ffn-bot/wiki/Usage) | [Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=tusing) ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ffnbot!ignore


[deleted]

[удалено]


ChaoticNichole

I would love to read this one!


lightwalnut64

Link?


ParanoidDrone

IIRC canon implies (but doesn't outright confirm) that it's for their money. Fanfic being what it is, you could spin it to be anything from that to politically motivated murder, constant failed attempts at finding "the one", being a legit serial killer, pure bad luck, etc. etc. etc.


Yin_Kirsi

I read a fic that it was a curse someone cast on her. And she is in denial the curse exists so she keeps remarrying.


msgeller123

This prompt is awesome and so much different from usual black family stays together and Dumbledore is evil stuff. Please please write a full length fic on this.


Proper-Literature173

Yes, please flesh this out and write a novel length story on this! Could be a little "Addams family" inspired, too. The vibe would fit.


chayoutofcontext

I will try sometime later to maybe do a short one ? Like 5 or 10 chapters top. But I need to finish my semester first..


pygmypuffonacid

If you decide to expand on this please post something about it I would love to read an extended version of the story it's such a great prompt and a wonderful idea I look forward to seeing what you right when you have a more time to write good luck with your classes by the way


Proper-Literature173

That would be great! But of course education comes first


Shah927

Yes if you ever write it please reply so I can come bank and read it


applepi101

Just replying in the hopes that when/if you do write more I’ll be able to read it!


Opia_lunaris

Agreed, this sounds so fresh and interesting OP


cgf13

Harry and Blaise start asking questions and they’re like “Oh, shit. We’re gonna accidentally fuck these kids up,” and the decide to stop, but it’s such a habit at this point that they don’t know how to communicate, so they decide (separately, without the other knowing) to start up again, but, like, mildly. They essentially start an accidental prank war without even realizing. They bicker at home, but they’re a united front outside the house. They’re one of those “Hey! Only I can call my wife/husband that!” couples. Because Sirius is still on the down low in France (and wizarding Britain being crazy insular helped), no one knows that Harry and Blaise’s respective parents are married. No one knows their association, but they’re those casual best friends who talk like they hate each other. They take after their parents in pranking one another. They accidentally start a prank war between Gryffindor and Slytherin. No one knows who started it. The pranks are amazing. The perfect mix of Gryffindor boldness and Slytherin cunning, learned at the hand of a son of the House of Black and The Black Widow of France. The teachers are baffled. The Weasley twins are delighted it’s happening and devastated they don’t know who’s doing it. When the boys go home for the holidays, they talk about their epic prank war like it’s nothing to have basically outdone the Marauders already in their first year. The parents exchange glances. They fucked up the kids after all. Oh, well. At least they aren’t killing anyone. Edit: Autocorrect doesn’t understand the appropriate place to use the word ‘duck’


pearloftheocean

And their relationship ends like Gomez and Morticia Addams'


Just_a_Lurker2

At the time his wife entered, Sirius was calmly petting the snake. ‘Darling, you do have the most amazing taste in pets,’ he said. ‘How did you know snakes are my favorite? They make such delightful snacks...’ Mrs. Zabini blushed a bright red. ‘You’ve such a way with animals Mr. Black! This is my sweetie Grace. I didn’t introduce you right away because I figured she’d scare you.’ She bit her lip and looked down. Sirius raised a eyebrow. ‘After those spiders and fabulous wild frogs? Dear Merlin, what else are you hiding from me? I’ll make her a terrarium, before the poor thing gets cold, eh Grace?’ Lovingly he put her into a warm bubble that only he could remove, never turning his back to her. ‘I brought you a glass of wine,’ she offered. ‘Thanks, but I’ll stick to beer,’ he said, nonchalantly popping the bottle open with his wand. After checking the bottleneck discretely, he took a deep drink. Merlin’s pants, the woman was worse than Bellatrix. ‘Mrs. Zabini,’ he began. ‘Do call me Belladonna, dear,’ she said, smiling. ‘You’ve earned that honor. And may I call you Sirius?’ He nodded slowly. ‘Belladonna. How... appropriate.’ ‘It’s a family business, this is,’ she said, by way of explanation. ‘Are you planning to... continue the tradition?’ He asked carefully. ‘Your godson is going to be *such* a heartbreaker, how could I not?’ Sirius wasn’t sure he liked that, but he let it slide. ‘I am getting the impression you don’t like me,’ he said. ‘Whatever gave you the idea?’ ‘The poisoned tea was a hint in the right direction,’ he said drily. ‘Now, I can handle it. But you *will not* hurt my godson, either directly or indirectly. Losing me would destroy him,’ he added, giving her a meaningful look. ‘And I’ll go back from the grave to destroy you if you do that. I gave my word I’d take care of Harry, so I *will* and not even Death itself will be able to stop me, **do you understand**? ‘But Sirius, it was all in good fun!’ She protested. ‘Can’t you take a *joke*?!’ ‘Yeah well, it’s all fun and games until someone loses a eye,’ he commented. ‘Now don’t give me any ideas darling,’ she said mischievously, but her face held her first real smile in ages.


pearloftheocean

I once read a fic in which Mrs. Zabini's first name is Emmarentia Zabini and I haven't been able to accept any other name ever since 😩😩


chayoutofcontext

Omg I didn't even think of a name for her 😭 I'll probably chose something italian because I intend for her to be from there.


berkeleyjake

This would be amazing! Do you already have a pen-name on one of the fic websites I can follow for when you do start writing? I can imagine family vacations would be fun. Blaise and Harry playing together while their parents look for foreign poisons and exotic curses from the region they are visiting.


chayoutofcontext

No, I've never written anything but if I do I'd probably post it on Ao3, My account is Tea403. I don't know when I will, but if I do, you'll find it there. I will also probably self promote it on this sub. Thanks for the encouragement!! I'll make sure to include Harry and Blaise scenes 😂


berkeleyjake

Great, I added you to my subscriptions there. I look forward to a great story in however long you take to write it.


SwordDude3000

I can’t find your account could you link it?


chayoutofcontext

https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tea403


SwordDude3000

Thanks! I subscribed


karigan_g

I LOVE this idea


pumpkin_noodles

I love this


pygmypuffonacid

Arturus Black Was cackling From beyond the grave. It was His grandson Sirius's 5th wedding anniversary and he had decide did to pay a surprise visit taking gratulate the happy couple on their half a decade of harmonious matrimony. There was a concealed ballista in the coat closet which had miraculously missed serious by a quarter of an inch embedding itself in the impromptu man bun he was sporting. Harry and blaze the ever oblivious 7 year old children laughing and thinking it was a game cheered for another one as their father pulled off such an impressive Dodge. Their mother Marguerite, Zambini -Black. As Arcturus had made a point of demanding She hyphenate her last name as part of the wedding contract increasing the woman's fury exponentially she had wanted access to the black fortune not to have to sign legal documents changing her name it was a mountain of paperwork and a mild and convenient that had nearly put her off the plan. But Sirius' Tea and crumpets had been laced with the Strickening at the wedding breakfast The next morning so the Union had progressed. This particular mode of assassination was to happily inform serious of the joyous news he was going to be a father again, Marguerite a murderous smile on her lips was tapping a pregnancy test against the polished mahogany of the Banister she was leaning against. The attempted death by arsenic covered condom had failed terribly for Sirius... He would have to confer with Remus again as to best kill his lovely wife But unfortunately he would have to be on the look out for the next year as the reason was obvious. Harry and blaze seemed to be quite ecstatic at the thought of a younger sibling joining the family serious smiled in the way he had long practiced of being both happy at the boys present state of mind and furious as well as murderous with his wife the plan to list the wine with Aconite would have to be postponed indefinitely


Starchyatom

Reminds me of the Addams family for some reason


ina_sri

Sirius: \*dodging a venom laced knife nonchalantly\*Darling Donna? Belladonna:\*expertly leaning on a couch while avoiding cursed patches of fabric\*Yes, love? Sirius:\*sniffing a bottle before pouring out a glass for himself\*Hedwig delivered a letter from Harry today. Belladonna: \*extracting poison from a pet viper\*Oh? Sirius: \*reading the letter aloud about Umbridge using blood quills\* Both: \*expression darkens\* The glance at each other and nod Donna: Looks like a pink toad needs to learn a lesson about carving in blood, darling. Sirius: Oh Bella, you read my mind.


readingaccountlol

Remindme! 3 months


ISeeYourDreams

Good idea


birdiswerid

Someone please write this. I need this.


KFC_Junior

remindme! 1 month


Professional-Bison-1

!remind me 3 days


Chess345

RemindMe! 1 month


Chess345

RemindMe! 1 week


VulpineKitsune

Why would he want to escape Dumbledore? Unless you are baking Dumbledore bashing into the prompt, in which case, *why*


chayoutofcontext

Because : 1) Dumbledore still thinks he was the secret keeper 2) Dumbledore sent Hagrid to take Harry. This isn't a bashing prompt and I honestly didn't even think of Dumbledore involvement in the story, but I think he would never allow Sirius to raise Harry because of the blood wards. In canon, he already had Harry sent to Petunia before even Sirius """killed"" Pettigrew or was caught my the aurors. So Dumbledore never really considered him as an option. And well even after Harry went to Hogwarts, he was against him leaving the Dursleys. So I totally imagine Sirius escaping from Dumbledore in order to take in Harry.


VulpineKitsune

That makes sense, ty.


QuirkyPuff

RemindMe!(3 days)


RemindMeBot

I will be messaging you in 3 days on [**2021-06-20 12:22:47 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2021-06-20%2012:22:47%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/HPfanfiction/comments/o1s8cj/sirius_takes_off_with_harry_in_1981_and/h22xwpa/?context=3) [**16 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5Bhttps%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2FHPfanfiction%2Fcomments%2Fo1s8cj%2Fsirius_takes_off_with_harry_in_1981_and%2Fh22xwpa%2F%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%202021-06-20%2012%3A22%3A47%20UTC) to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam. ^(Parent commenter can ) [^(delete this message to hide from others.)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Delete%20Comment&message=Delete%21%20o1s8cj) ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/comments/e1bko7/remindmebot_info_v21/)|[^(Custom)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5BLink%20or%20message%20inside%20square%20brackets%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%20Time%20period%20here)|[^(Your Reminders)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Reminders&message=MyReminders%21)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=RemindMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|


Dear_Ad8242

>RemindMe!(3 days) RemindMe!(3 days)


Aiyania

Can Blaise still be thought of as a girl in this fic and she can constantly fall into dryers asking harry for help. The laundry room is obviously filled with deadly traps trying to kill harry to take after her mother.


Niel_Xandor

RemindMe! 1 month


RemindMeBot

I will be messaging you in 1 month on [**2021-07-22 12:49:34 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2021-07-22%2012:49:34%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/HPfanfiction/comments/o1s8cj/sirius_takes_off_with_harry_in_1981_and/h2n9so5/?context=3) [**1 OTHERS CLICKED THIS LINK**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5Bhttps%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2FHPfanfiction%2Fcomments%2Fo1s8cj%2Fsirius_takes_off_with_harry_in_1981_and%2Fh2n9so5%2F%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%202021-07-22%2012%3A49%3A34%20UTC) to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam. ^(Parent commenter can ) [^(delete this message to hide from others.)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Delete%20Comment&message=Delete%21%20o1s8cj) ***** |[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/comments/e1bko7/remindmebot_info_v21/)|[^(Custom)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5BLink%20or%20message%20inside%20square%20brackets%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%20Time%20period%20here)|[^(Your Reminders)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Reminders&message=MyReminders%21)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=RemindMeBot%20Feedback)| |-|-|-|-|